Author Archive

Ugly Wallpaper (Bazooka Nanny: Government Superhero)

Bigger than a tall building, Faster than a light-rail train, Exploiter of the ignorant, shafter of the hapless, Wiser than God and richer than you, it’s… Bazooka Nanny: Government Superhero Today’s episode: Ugly Wallpaper “Are you going to get that?! That alarm’s been going off for the last half-hour.” Nanny peered over his bag of […]

No, Mr. Obama, the Government Is Not Us

Q: How do you know when a politician is lying? A: His lips are moving. As one might expect, Obama’s speech at the University of Michigan this past weekend contained a healthy portion of misstatements, debatable half-truths, and deep-thick bullshit. If political rhetoric were to pollute our drinking water, we’d be perpetually living in a […]

Political Bytes

The government “golf cart” subsidy This is too funny for me to have made it up. The IRS has ruled that Obama’s stimulus bill subsidizes actual, honest-to-goodness golf carts, under the “high-mileage vehicle” provision. This is causing golf-cart sales to soar. Laments Doug Bandow of the Cato Institute, “In a normal world this would be […]

You Wanna Win a Nobel Peace Prize, Too?

As you know, Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize last Friday. At first, I thought it was some sort of joke. And then I decided it actually was. “Wow. They’re giving them out to everyone now, aren’t they?” The sentiment is not mine alone. For example, Ana Marie Cox, National Correspondent for Air America […]

The Semantics of “Healthcare Reform”

Michael Cloud decades ago said, profoundly, “In the jungle, the rule is kill or be killed. In politics, either define or be defined. Because words are weapons; words are tools.” (From the Essence of Political Persuasion CD series.) If you want to control the direction of a debate, find a way to control the language […]

The Asshole vs. the Nicest Man You’d Ever Want to Meet

A very old friend of mine pointed me to this article at the Boston Herald, about Paul Keigan and his story of how the American dream is over. Long story short: Paul Keigan started out as a Canadian immigrant 48 years ago, with $96 and the American dream. He got into sales at a car […]

Lie Detecting: A Bullshit Episode Penn & Teller Should Do

Penn & Teller haven’t yet done an episode on lie detecting for their Emmy-nominated series Penn & Teller: Bullshit! (which you can get on DVD). On Bullshit Penn & Teller expose, rip apart, and generally make fun of nonsense from talking to the dead to alien abduction to alternative, new-age medical mumbo jumbo to conspiracy […]

Don't Underestimate the Objects of Our Thanks

The following was originally published at Dad-o-matic. As we approach this holiday season, it seems we have little to be thankful about. Still topping the news are stories of death and dire. Abraham Biggs, a Florida teenager blogs that he will commit suicide and then webcasts a video of the event, live, while viewers on […]

Would I Run? (If you’ve read this viral email…)

An old friend of the family forwarded a viral email that asks the question “Would you run?” I’ll tell you how I answered it, but first let me reprint the relevant part of the email. Imagine this happening to you… One Sunday morning service, a 2,000 member congregation was surprised to see two men enter, […]

Convicting Anyone of Anything

A jury convicted Lori Drew of breaking MySpace’s terms of service, possibly sending her to prison for years, if the verdict stands up on appeal. Why? Because she was involved in setting up a fake MySpace account, posing as a teenage boy, in order to mess with the emotions of a psychologically fragile teenage girl […]